Beauty from Ashes by Anna Marie Sumwalt

Introduction

Good morning. My name is Anna Marie Sumwalt. I am 20 years old and I have grown up in this church. I am a junior at Clemson University and I am studying nursing.

In case that’s not enough, I can continue to tell you about my non-existent seminary background to continue to prove to you that I am completely inadequate to be up here preaching for God. The beauty of this is, I am up here with God. And thus I am perfectly inadequate. The same goes for Him sending me to Kenya. He took my ashes (my testimony, my sin, my inadequacy) and chose to use me, which is beautiful.

For those of you who do not know, I had the opportunity to go to Kenya with an organization called Love Africa for three weeks in May. Today I am going to tell you about what this trip taught me. I am not up here to tell you all of the stories and logistical details of my trip because if you haven’t already heard those, I would love to get together and talk about them in a smaller group. It is easier in my opinion to talk about it and to share adequately what he opened my eyes to that way. Behind be I have some pictures scrolling that will begin to give you some insight as to what I got to experience while immersed in the Kenyan culture. Also, I am not up here to try to change your heart to love missions in Kenya. The Lord calls us all to serve in different ways and through that service He grows and teaches us. Mission work and serving is a necessity all over the world if we are adequately living out our faith. Today I am going to tell you a little about what God has been teaching me through this experience about being obedient to His calling for us.

Calling and Obedience

A big step to getting me to Kenya, was me learning to be radically obedient and to trust to the Lord’s calling. Nathan Smith, who is head of the Love Africa Mission, gave a message at Clemson FCA one night. He did not talk about Kenya and I did not take the time to stop by the missions table they had set up outside. Later that week I had a friend tell me that as a nursing major who loves Christ, I should look into the trip because it would be an awesome opportunity to serve in a children’s hospital in Kenya. I brushed it off. Numerous times after that, the trip continued to come up in conversation. I decided that I didn’t think it was for me because I did not think I would be able to take that much time off of work in the summer. God kept bringing it to my attention and I finally told him that I would run it by my parents. When I did, they were completely fine with it. Check. Well, I still wasn’t sure if I would be able to take time off work, but God made it clear really quickly that it would not be a problem. Check. Finally, I was worried about raising the money to fund the trip, but God proved me wrong there, as well. Check. Before I knew it, I was on a plane to Kenya!

Galations 5:13-14 “You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love. For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: Love your neighbor as yourself.”

Everyone who has been saved by the Lord’s grace is called to serve and to love one another. This is actually so important that Christ came to earth, from His comfortable throne in Heaven, to help teach us how to do this.         

I think we as humans have a common misconception that our God is not powerful and sovereign and perfect in His creation. Our mighty God did NOT create too many people and not enough love to go around this planet. Matthew 25:40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you do for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” When we look around this church, or your workplace, or your neighborhood, or our world, these people are your brothers and sisters in Christ. It is very easy for me to pick and choose the people I want to serve (white women who do not have contagious diseases, or elementary school children who do not yet has access to weapons or strength to hurt me), but what does Jesus think of that. If your own sister (as in same mother) came to you in need, would you set a boundary for her? Well Jesus wouldn’t. Jesus came to earth and spent the night with poor people, He touched lepers, He spent time with people we would put in jail. He trusted the Lord and loved God’s children. He came and showed us how to love one another well. He came to earth to paint a picture of how he loves us- bringing our ashes (sin, imperfection) into beauty. And He calls us to do the same.

The Lord has been teaching me a lot through Isaiah 61 this summer. It paints a beautiful picture of what it should look like when we serve. My favorite part of this verse talks about the Lord working through us to turn ashes into beauty. He calls us to love people- ALL people well. This can be a pretty scary realization. But, We are walking WITH our God, not FOR Him. We are walking with a global God who provides and redeems, how dare we doubt Him. I know I sure need to be more expectant of Him provision.

Global, Provider, Redeemer

In Kenya I learned the extent of our God being a global God. We had the opportunity to worship at a Massi church. The Massi tribe is the fiercest tribe in Kenya and their primary religion is not Christianity. Nevertheless, some of the tribal members walk a good distance on Sunday mornings to come together and worship in their tribal language. During the amazing worship service, our team took a turn to lead a song in our language. We chose to sing Amazing Grace. As we sang, the Massi people recognized the tune and sang along in their tribal language. It was the most beautiful worship experience I have ever participated in. That is what the Bible tells us Heaven is going to be like! All of us will come together from our different cultures to worship our God!

I got to see the Lord’s provision in a whole new light. On a daily basis I pray to him for things such as, to provide for my education, take away my stress, or keep me safe in my car. And there is nothing wrong with that! The Bible commands us to be in constant communication with the father and to place all of our burdens on His shoulders.  But I must realize that around the world people pray for rain for their crops, for a bucket to carry water in, and for their baby to stop crying because they don’t know why it is crying. And God provides for both of us.

Finally, The Lord redeems people all over the globe from the darkest of places. But the crazy thing that I am learning is that these places look scarily similar regardless of our culture. Whether He redeems of from a broken family caused by divorce or by violence. Whether he heals us from prostitution or seduction. Whether he forgives us from stealing food, lying, using drugs to escape pain, or pornography.

In Kenya our team spent some time at Naomi’s Village children’s home. On our first day there, I got to go pick up a new baby to bring back as the newest addition to their family. This baby had been abandoned and left “near a place where they sell coal.” Some one walked past him the morning after a 50 degree night and found him lying on the ground with the placenta still attached.  They took him to a nearby hospital, which was really more of an outdoor, open, airy clinic. For some strange reason a nurse at the hospital decided to care for the child. Typically, in Kenya, treatment is not provided unless people can prove that they can pay. This nurse named the baby Moses (okay… not an accident), called Auntie Julie, who runs Naomi’s Village, and asked her if they could take the baby in. Not long before that phone call, the children in the baby room at Naomi’s Village had graduated to the toddler room. Auntie Julie and the other staff were aware that babies are often abandoned in their area so they began to pray that if a baby was abandoned, that the Lord would bring it to them. Of course, we got in the mattatu (vehicle) to go pick up this answered prayer.  That day I got to hold a living miracle. As I looked down at the precious six-pound baby (this was very exciting because that is healthy for a Kenyan baby!), I thought to myself, “You are a miracle. We could write another book in the Bible telling your story. God wanted you to live.” God brought Moses from the darkest of places and provided him with comfort, care, and hope. He globally redeems and provides for ALL of his children.

Worth It.

Have you talked to God lately about how you love others? I think we have this American fear that we need to get over. The fear that if we give, we won’t have enough for ourselves. God provides and redeems, globally. He loves all of His children well. And to do this, He uses us to love one another. We are the least of these. Look how Jesus treated us. It is time we start being expectant and trusting Him with control over our lives.

God didn’t call us to an easy walk. But he promised it would be worth it. Two wonderful people that I met in Kenya are Bob and Julie Mendonsa, who run Naomi’s Village. Bob was an orthopedic surgeon in America. God asked him to go on a short term mission trip to Kenya to train Kenyan residents to do orthopedic surgery. One thing led to another and after their fourth two-month mission trip, Bob and Julie decided that they needed to obey the Lord’s calling and move to Kenya and open a children’s home. So they picked up from what they describe as their “very comfortable American life,” and they along with their two teenage children, moved to Kenya. After two and a half years, they have taken 44 Kenya children into their home. As they recall the details of their story they emphasize over and over that for one child, all of it was worth it. It is amazing to see God work to save lives through normal people being obedient like Bob and Julie.

Four children who they have now adopted were orphaned by a tragedy in their hometown. Their town had a gas line running through it that line developed a leak. People of the town would go to the gas line and fill up buckets with the gasoline and take it back to their homes (drip, drip, drip) where they could sell it or use it to cook. Trails of gasoline formed all over their town and caught fire when someone threw down a lit cigarette. It was a huge tragedy and those four children were able to escape. Their last memory of their families is watching them burn alive. That is horrifying. But God had a plan for their lives and he brought them to the Naomi’s Village to provide them with comfort and hope. God redeemed them from that hard time in their life. Talk about beauty from ashes..

Another girl that I met in Kenya was actually the child of another American missionary. She was 17 years old and as she told me her incredible testimony or how the Lord had captured her heart, she ended by explaining that her heart was for the people in Afghanistan because they truly need Jesus. And if she had it her way, she would move over there today to share that with them. But she is at a point in her life where she is learning to accept that if God calls her to be a housewife in Midwest America- she has to be content and do the best she can to live her life for Jesus. That conversation really had me starting to evaluate me outlook on life.

Walking with God is about serving and being selfless to that He can work through you. It will be WORTH IT.

Are You Doing Your Part?

There are 143 million orphaned children; 11 million die from starvation or preventable disease; 8.5 million work as child slaves, prostitutes, or under horrific conditions; 2.3 million live with HIV. That totals to 164.8 million needy children. Now, there are 2.1 billion people on earth that claim to be Christians. If only 8% of Christians would care for one more child there would not be any of these statistics left.

Are you doing your part for God?

But not everyone’s heart has to be for children. God broke mine for the women in Kenya. I know many people in this church have hearts for Nicaragua, or Salkehatchie, or Epworth. That is the beauty of this perfect puzzle- He doesn’t call us all to an orphanage in Africa.

I was incredibly blessed to be called to serve in Kenya this summer and I will be estatic if he asks me to go back at some point in my life. But I have also been blessed to be called to serve at Salkehatchie 5 times, locally. That is key. Now speaking of being inadequate to serve, 15 year old Anna Marie Sumwalt sure did not know how to put in a window, reload a nail gun, or shingle a roof. But God used me there.

God placed people all over this earth to love ALL of his children. He did not create to many children without intentions of loving each of them. There are people in this town and church who live in poor conditions, don’t have enough to eat, don’t have a family to love them, and who don’t know Jesus.

Like Jesus, For not About

Part of God’s plan for these people is for us to care for them, not care about them. Matthew 25:40 says “whatever you DID for one of the least of these, you DID for me.” DO is a verb. We can sit here and have this discussion all day about all of the need in the world and care about the least of these, but guess what? At 12:30 when you are late for lunch, or at 9pm when it’s time for you to go to bed, and we are still talking, they are still poor. Jesus called us to care FOR them, not ABOUT them. It is WORTH IT.

Jesus cared for the poor spiritually, mentally, and physically. He introduced them to the father’s grace and redemption, he showed them friendship and love, and He healed them and provided for them. And when He did this, He went to find them. He never expected them to find the church. He listened to His father, and took the church to them. He touched them, and he got on their level. Galations 5:13-14 “You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love. For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: Love your neighbor as yourself.”

Challenge

When we serve like this, and we are communicating with the Lord; when we are walking WITH our God and not FOR Him; when we are being radically obedient to His calling; He takes the ashes of this world, and turns them into something beautiful. You are so blessed. Do you look at your life and realize that? Matthew 10:8 reminds us that “freely you have received; freely give.” You can’t out give God.

I want to challenge you and myself this week to step it up a notch when you serve and when you love the people God puts in your life. I mean Why Not when you are walking WITH OUR GOD? I promise you it WILL BE WORTH IT. Has God ever left you hanging for no reason? Allow God to make ashes into beauty through you. What if the day comes when you meet God in heaven, and He looks at you and as He says in Matthew 25:21 “Well done my good and faithful servant...”

Let us pray. 

Thoughts on “Leaving Neverland” by Lacy Ngo

The sermon today was about where we are “rooted” in life.  Of the “roots” mentioned, one was definitely a “root” of mine and that was pleasure.  As a mostly stay-at-home mom, at the beginning of each week, I often think about how am I going to keep my child and family entertained this week.  What are we going to do fun this week along with all of my daily errands?  Not that we shouldn’t enjoy life, have fun, and “smell the roses” so to speak, but shouldn’t my everyday focus be on serving God.  As a Christian, I feel that life is not about the pursuit of happiness, but our focus should be more on serving God selflessly as Jesus did.  We should be living for God.  I would guess that most of us are not reaching our full potential as Christians or most of us have a long way to go before becoming “mature” Christians, as described in todays sermon.  I would say I am still a very immature Christian on a daily basis. 

Second, I am always amazed how the music and sermon are not planned together, yet they seem to go together so often, particularly the song directly following the sermon.  The sermon also mentioned how we should focus on truly seeing the real God instead of wanting to make God fit our lifestyle so that we don’t have to change.  We try to make God like us instead of being like him.  Today the song, “Until the Whole World Hears,” reiterated the sermon when saying, “And see the world through Your eyes, I want to be your hands and feet; I want to live a life that leads…And I pray that they will see, More of you and less of me, Lord, I want my life to be; The song You sing.”

            After the sermon, our Sunday school teacher shared a few thoughts on our sermon as well.  He said he feels like he has some fruit “rooted’ in his garden, but weeds keep popping up as well.  Our teacher also mentioned that, he does keep trying to pluck up the weeds instead of letting them take over.  Thanks to God’s grace we keep plucking weeds, and God keeps forgiving and giving us a “clean” start over and over. 

            My next question to myself is how do I mature as a Christian?  If I am really honest, I should probably focus each week on how am I going to serve God this week instead of how am I going to entertain my family this week.  I should also concentrate on thinking of God in every move I make throughout the week.  I need to talk to Him more regularly throughout the day.

Sing For Me by Pastor Debra

     It is likely that this is something you already know about me: I am a lover of music and I deeply appreciate the hymnody of the Church.  I grew up encouraged daily, by loving, musical, Christian parents to identify a song for every occasion and circumstance in life, and, as a result of their love, I find great meaning in songs which express our existence as lived in the presence of a creative, loving God. Music helps me to dig deeper into the ashes of life’s disappointments and pain and discover hope which renews my confidence in the One who inspired yesterday, and inspires still today, the greatest hymn writers and composers.

As one of your pastors, I am privileged to be made aware of and to pray for many painful situations in the lives of God’s children.  As I reflect on the many concerns of each of our hearts, as I pray for you and for your families, it is no surprise that God’s assurance of hearing and healing comes to me in song.  I have shared, from the pulpit, the beginnings of the “prayer songs” which I offer each Sunday as a portion of the message which God, through the Holy Spirit, places upon my heart each week. For those who may not remember or who may not have been present on that particular Sunday morning, let me briefly describe the origin of the prayer song offertory prior to each sermon.

I began the path of ministry when still very young, (I was 18), it is only as we grow older that we realize how very young we once were, isn’t this true?  My first assignment in ministry was while I was still in college as I served as assistant to our college Chaplain, and in a number of churches through music ministry and Bible Studies with youth and children.  While a student at Yale Divinity School, I served as an Associate Pastor in a Congregational Church. (My Divinity School encouraged us to work ecumenically.) I served with the Chaplain of the University through Rutledge Chapel and had really amazing experiences while still a student intern. Music was an integral part of my education and focus through the Institute of Sacred Music at Yale, and the Masters of Divinity degree I have represents a full music and divinity curriculum during my years in New Haven.

All of this is to say that when I arrived in South Carolina, for my first appointment as a full-time pastor, I wore my warm “New England” black robe (in July, in churches which had not yet imagined air conditioning) and I preached my 3 point sermons from a 5 page, double-spaced typed manuscript, just as I had been taught to do in my divinity school homiletics courses. The ironies of my Yale education, in the midst of my first appointment, are many, and most I will save for another reflection, but for the purposes of today’s thoughts, let me assure you, I did not speak the language of the very poor, mostly illiterate congregations, who surely didn’t want a “woman preacher” in the first place. It did not matter to the people I was sent to serve that I was their first preacher to have a “seminary education”, an attempted selling point of my faithful District Superintendent, in 1977. I was lost in a culture which I did not understand, and I had no idea how to “speak to their longing hearts”. I had been assigned for only one week when, as I prayed at the altar of the largest of the three churches, I heard within my own heart the Holy Spirit speak, “Sing for me, and sing for these children of mine. Music will reach their hearts and minds, when just words are not enough. Music really is my universal language and through it you will also come to understand and appreciate one another.” In light of God’s guidance in the early portion of my years of ministry, and even to this day, please let me share these personally meaningful song lyrics (written by Rolf Lovland and Brendan Graham in 2002) in the hope that you will be comforted by them, as I am.

    “You Raise Me Up” - When I am down, and oh, my soul’s so weary. When troubles come and my heart burdened be, then I am still and wait here, in the silence, until you come and sit awhile with me. You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains, you raise me up, to walk on stormy seas. I am strong, when I am on your shoulders, you raise me up to more than I can be.  There is no life, no life without its sorrows, each restless heart beats so imperfectly, but then you come and fill our hearts with wonder, it’s then we know we glimpse eternity.

                          God’s Love in the journey,  Pastor Debra

Thank You St. John's for Impacting My Life

 I was recently doing a devotional question that asked, “Who and what has taught you or impacted your life, and what lesson’s will you never forget?”  I started to casually and quickly jot down my answers and was surprised at how many people have impacted my life even through the smallest acts.  I have always heard that a small act of kindness or a simple comment can have a huge impact, but until I answered this question, I never really believed it was true.  I also noticed how many people from church have had an impact. 

First, the obvious influences from church are the pastors and Sunday school teachers.  Sermons by my pastors, Debra Quilling Smith and Rett Haselden, have absolutely changed my actions in life. The church bands have motivated me when I needed encouragement, and God has even spoken to me through them.  The discussions lead by the Sunday school teachers, Matt and Emily Bell, J and Elizabeth Morgan, John Moore, and James Williamson have certainly helped me grow. James Williamson has recently influenced us by using his knowledge of the Bible and helped us see how to use the Bible in our daily lives.  Elizabeth Morgan may not realize that she has absolutely changed the way I act in life by simply mentioning a book by Brother Andrew in passing. That book taught me how to better hear God when he is speaking. The speeches I heard during the fulfilling freedom campaign have stayed with me as well.  Too many names come to mind when I think of all the people who have welcomed me and made me feel like part of the church family.  All these above are examples of the more obvious influences; however, I was surprised to notice how many others have impacted me by what may have seemed like only small actions.  For example, Lollie Haselden, Clay Summers, and Jutta Faris were probably big reasons we joined St. John’s.  When we were visiting, Lollie and Clay were standing near the entrance and were so friendly and welcoming to us as strangers.  Then, Jutta approached us before the service, introduced herself, and even gave us a tour of the church after the service.  Even kind words from my church family have stuck with me, like comments from Pat White, Marie Leonard, and Ida Newsom.  Ida Newsom has made simple comments on how to show love to all of her church family that still sticks with me.

So what did I learn from all of this?  I learned how greatly people affect each other everyday without ever realizing it.  If others affect me so much; then how much can some small action or comment of mine benefit someone?  I want to remember to use kind words and be friendly to all.  I want to show thoughtfulness throughout my daily life. I want to remember that we never know when our small actions or comments are going to mean so much and even change someone’s life.  I know some of these people I named never had a clue that they influenced me.  My last thought is that if you know of someone who has influenced you, I would love for you to post it on this blog.  You may just want to post a quick one-sentence thank you or maybe you have a whole story to tell.  Please tell us who has impacted you.  

When I Knew God Loved Me by Lacy Ngo

I was so excited about going to middle school.  I felt all grown up and ready to meet new people I had carefully decided on a pink v-neck shirt and a pair of  jean shorts that had a pink ruffle on the bottom.  The first few weeks of sixth grade went okay.  I was making many new friends, but I became particularly close with two girls.  We started going over to each other’s houses and talking on the phone every night.   Sixth grade was going okay until something happened…

This was probably the first huge lesson of my young life.  I learned that people can be cruel, especially sixth grade girls.  Now understand, these girls weren’t bad people.  In fact, only a couple were the leaders and the rest quietly followed.   Afterall, being in sixth grade is tough.  Sixth Graders often feel that you need to put others down to make yourself look better.  If you can put down someone else, then people will pay attention to you, or that’s what you think when you are in sixth grade.  If you want to be cool, you must show how utterly uncool someone else is.  Someone has to be the loser or outcast or no one can be the winner.   A few months into sixth grade, I was picked to be the outcast.  One day, the two girls I had befriended started doing things to deliberately hurt me.  Later I found out from another friend that they thought it was funny to see me mad, and that this was why they liked picking on me.  They began by ignoring me.  I particularly remember one incidence that occurred in gym class while we were practicing lay-ups.  One of the girls had just made a shot, so I held out my hand for her to give me a high five.  She wouldn’t even look at me.  She just walked right past me with a smurk on her face.  She ran straight to the other girl and started giggling.  The ignoring was just the beginning.  They then began to spread silly rumors about me.   Shortly after the rumors spread, I saw a group of girls talking before class.   As I approached the group, one of the girls whispered, “ Here comes Lacy, everyone turn your back.”  They actually huddled together in a circle with their backs to me when I greeted them.  Believe me, that was not a happy moment in my life.  

On one of the worst days, another girl and I walked up to the lunch table where we usually sat and noticed that no one was there.  Then, I notice a few of the girls that we usually sat with standing near a table on the other side of the lunchroom.  I walked over to them and asked if we were sitting over here today.  They said no and to save them a seat at the other table.  I sat at the the other table saving their seats, but the other girls never came to the table.  The two of us were sitting at a huge table all by ourselves.  You can imagine what that does to an eleven-year-old girl’s reputation.  When I realized what was happening, I moved to another table.    Then, the girls at this table thought it would be funny to throw my lunch on the ground.  I couldn’t eat my lunch because it was ruined.  

These kinds of incidences went on for a while in sixth grade.  I felt so alone, like I didn’t have a friend in the world.  I hated going to school.  I dreaded it!  I didn’t feel happy at home either.  Don’t misunderstand me; my parents were wonderful. I didn’t like going home because I knew that meant night was coming, and I would have to try to sleep.  Every single night I couldn’t sleep.  I was so lonely and the dark made me feel even more alone.  I would lie there absolutely terrified.  My heart felt like it was in my throat.  I would be in a panic because I was all by myself in my room.  I felt sad almost all of the time.  I tried to hide it from my parents because I didn’t want to make them sad.  I didn’t want them to feel like their daughter was a loser.  

I began to question why this was happening to me.  My young 11-year-old mind thought, ‘I didn’t do bad things;  I didn’t smoke, or talk back to my parents (most of the time).  I made good grades and went to church, so why was this happening to me?’  

The questioning got me thinking.  I began thinking about things that I had never thought about before.  I started wondering if God really existed, and if so, why was he letting the other kids be so mean to me?  I started thinking, why should I believe in God, just because my parents said so?    If God was there, I had never really given him much thought before.  Sure, I went to church, knew the story, and even accepted it as true, but I never truly understood.  The night I began pondering, I decided to pray to God that if he was real, show me a sign.  Within the same week, while walking home on the same road I took every single day, I saw a tree distinctly shaped as a cross.  I had never seen it before, yet I had taken that path every day that year.

On another day, something very strange and even more wonderful happened.  I was lying on the couch one night watching T.V. with my parents.  As  usual, I was feeling terribly sad and alone, dreading the inevitable bedtime, when I suddenly felt strange.  God spoke to me!  I felt God tell me he loved me.  I wasn’t watching anything spiritual or hadn’t been thinking  about God.  The words just came from nowhere.  I didn’t hear a voice; I just felt the words being said to me, and a warmth came over me.  God was telling me he loved me, and that I was never alone.  I know the words came from God because it changed my life.  At that moment, I felt an indescribable joy, greater than I had ever felt before.  I knew that even though I did not feel loved at school, I was not alone.  Someone who loved me was with me all the time.  I did have someone there who loved me while I was in school.  I realized I wasn’t alone at night while I slept in my room.  In a moment, all of these realizations came to me, all at once!  Suddenly, I did not dread going to school or to my room at night.  I knew I wasn’t ever going to be alone again, and I knew I had never really been alone.  I didn’t care what people said because the most important being in the world loved me.  Everything else seemed trivial.  It was amazing to me that all of this knowledge came to me at once.  I knew God had spoken to me.  

That night was the beginning of a new life for me.  I truly didn’t care what people thought of me anymore, but consequently; I almost instantly found new friends.  The ignoring, teasing, and rumors stopped or at least I didn’t hear them.  I loved going to church.  I started having fun at youth group.    Oh, and at night, I slept.  I loved going to my room because it was a chance for me to be alone with God.  I would often pray myself to sleep.    This was the beginning of my new life with God.  Today, I still go through moments of sadness, but I have not since felt as unhappy as I felt that year.  Now, I realize that the whole year of teasing was a miracle.  Although I was not perfect, I was more aware of my actions towards others all through middle school and high school.  I was careful about making fun and being cruel to others.  I tried to be friendly to everyone and I hope I succeded most of the time.  I am thankful that God showed me how much it hurt to be picked on or bullied.  These events helped me grow as a person. -Lacy Ngo